By Rachna Buxani, Counsellor, Delhi Private School, Sharjah

WHATEVER YOUR age, the Internet is a great place for fun. It's not only entertaining, but it lets you keep in touch with friends and family and provides an enormous amount of information. However, this fascinating technology is not hazard free. Everyday youngsters are being exploited on the Internet by receiving information that they are clearly too young to obtain or by being drawn into unhealthy relationships. Teenagers are most likely to get into trouble online because they like to explore out-of-the-way nooks and crannies of cyberspace, they're more likely to reach out to people outside of their immediate peer groups and, sadly, they're more often preyed upon as victims by paedophiles and other exploiters.

Talk to your teen about what they can and cannot do online. By setting reasonable guidelines for Internet usage, parents can help their children take advantage of all the positive aspects of the Internet while avoiding most of its pitfalls. Discuss these rules and post them near the computer as a reminder. Remember to monitor their compliance with these rules, especially when it comes to the amount of time your children spend on the computer. A child or teenager's excessive use of online services, especially late at night, may be a clue that there is a potential problem.

It's not uncommon for people to make "friends" in chat rooms. You enter a room; start a conversation with someone; and, before you know it, you've established a relationship of sorts. Chat rooms are sometimes used by people to exploit others. Monitor the amount of time your children spend chatting and who their chat friends are. Get to know their "online friends" just as you get to know all of their other friends.

Precautions

Never allow a child to arrange a face-to-face meeting with another computer user without parental permission. If a meeting is arranged, make the first one in a public spot, and be sure to accompany your child.

Make Internet browsing a family activity. Consider keeping the computer in a family room rather than the child's bedroom. Learn everything you can about the Internet. Today, when children are exposed to technology at a young age, parents often find themselves lagging behind their children in computer skills. Surprisingly, this may be the key to your involvement. What better way to learn about the Internet then to do so alongside your child?

There are services that rate web sites for content as well as filtering programs and browsers that empower parents to block the types of sites they consider to be inappropriate. These programs work in different ways. Some block sites known to contain objectionable material. Some prevent users from entering certain types of information such as their name and address. Other programs keep your kids away from chat rooms or restrict their ability to send or read E-mail. Generally, these programs can be configured by the parent to block the types of sites that the parent considers to be objectionable.

Ask your teenager to never respond to messages or bulletin board items that are suggestive, obscene, threatening, or that make them feel uncomfortable. There are a lot of Web sites waiting to entice the immature and the vulnerable. Encourage your children to tell you if they encounter such messages. If they tell you about someone or something they encountered, your first response should not be to blame them or take away their Internet privileges. Work with them to help them avoid problems in the future, and remember - how you respond will determine whether they confide in you the next time they encounter a problem and how they learn to deal with problems on their own.

Tell your teen not give out personal information such as address, telephone number, parents' work address/telephone number, or the name and location of their school without your permission. Also establish that they cannot post their pictures online without your consent. Emphasise the importance of never exchanging photographs with people they don't know. At this age they need to understand clearly the fact that people on the Internet may not be who they appear to be.

The power of computers and the power of the Internet have provided families with unprecedented tools for communication, learning and having fun. With this power comes responsibility of supervising the use of these tools to enhance family values. Educate yourself and your children on the dangers of using the Internet to ensure that you take advantage of the Internet as a resource while protecting your children!!

Photo courtesy: chp.edu & keykatcher.com

Rachna Buxani, with an M.Ed in School Counseling from Suffolk University in Boston and a B.A. in Psychology with a concentration in Child and Youth from Eastern Connecticut State University, USA has specialised in Middle and High School Counseling. Rachna's expertise is in assessment and management of problems related to adolescence. She would be regularly writing on parenting issues on womenone.org and would be providing answers to readers' queries related to it.